Let’s address the HUGE WHITE ELEPHANT in the room. It is February 8th, not January 1, 2023. Why then would I be so bold, or stupid, to write about a new year?!?!
By now the annual resolutionist crowd has started to die off. By now many has lost their annual steam. By now we are focused on the chocolates of Valentine’s Day instead of sweating on the Stairmaster.
Those are very valid points. Also valid is why this post is coming out in February instead of January. I could lie and say that it was intentional so that it didn’t get lost in the New Year noise with every other fitness article, but I’m not smart enough to be that deep.
So you are left with the real reason: 2023 has REALLY been the YEAR OF ME so far which means I’ve been too freaking busy to sit down and get my thoughts from theory to publication.
Too many people take on a short term mantra only to abandon it that quickly. I would like to be better a better business owner and better fitness influencer by always catching the latest crazes and waves, BUT not at the expense of me, the person that has struggled lately and needs MY attention.
Since March 15, 2020, like most people, especially entrepreneurs, I have been busy plugging holes in my boat in order to stay afloat. I was shut down, then I was online, then I was open but cautious, then growth and membership stalled, then I closed the Greensburg site, then I rebranded my business, and on, and on, and on. It was an exhausting pace, though needed at the time, that left me a shell of myself.
Then in November of 2022, I went down to one of my all-time favorite events, World’s Toughest Mudder in Atemore, Alabama only to realize that I didn’t recognize the person or athlete that showed up at the start line. I tried to settle back into my old GSD (Get Sh!t Done) mentality but it didn’t fit. I still had a solid event, especially since I had neglected my own training so much, but I came away with a weird feeling.
I wasn’t comfortable in who/where I was, but I didn’t want to go back exactly to the old me either. I was older, my family was in a new phase, my business was completely different, and I wasn’t hunting the same achievements. I knew I was lost but I didn’t know how far yet or where I wanted to go.
So over the next 2 months I did almost nothing when it came to me. I was still busy shuttling kids to practices and rebranding my fitness company from Change Fitness to Adventure Fit. But I wasn’t busy on me yet.
The new year always produces a lot of buzz in my industry. Most years I try to ignore it because it also has a reputation for predatory practices and many industry casualties by March. In the past I would roll my eyes at New Year’s resolutions and quietly go in my own direction.
It was evident that I had experienced burn out but in a slow burn way that left me wondering what happened. I needed something new. I needed a personal reinvention. Something that made me uncomfortable yet served a purpose in my life.
I have always prided myself on being a fit dad. It was after all one of the main reasons I got into a career in fitness. Yet I noticed something disturbing leading up to my then present state of undertrained and burnt out. I had become worried about becoming a fraud in kids’ eyes. I felt Father Time’s breath as I looked forward to turning 40 years old. And instead of digging in for a fight, I hid in the shadows of “better than others”.
In my subconscious I was afraid that I couldn’t keep up with my oldest son, Dominic, in his cross country pursuits. So I still ran while he trained with his team, but I did it out of sight so that I wouldn’t be exposed. I cheered him on in swim but did so with doubt that I could beat a 10 year old if he challenged. He ran a local 5k (finishing in 24:12) as I hid behind needing to help the organizers behind the scene not really knowing if I could still beat him.
So as 2023 rolled around, I chose to step out of the shadows of my former self and into the light of my new self. It was painful. I was up 25lbs vs my racing weight and not able to do a lot of the things from my past. But I was determined not to follow the path of so many has been idol dads talking about what I’ve done and into the vulnerability of being someone who wanted a fresh start.
I set crazy goals. Many of them as competitions against my sons. I went for something new and started training to get “fast at forty” instead of hiding behind the familiarity of distance. I did baseline 5k runs, 20 mins bike FTP tests, and 400/200 yard swim tests. I got back to lifting with a friend and made it a competition about consistency. The biggest thing I did was share with my son that he was faster than me but that dad was back to chasing him again.
It just happened that all these things clicked right at the start of a new year. Instead of shying away from the energy that comes with a new year, I went head first in. I shared my goals and went to work on them. 6 weeks in, I’m 100% on my cardio and resistance training program, I’ve lost 15lbs, and I’m back to being faster than Dom (even if just for a moment). I’ve had a handful of late night sessions due to poor planning. I’ve had some reschedules due to life curveballs. But I have never wavered in my desire to make 2023 about a new me that is a better dad and in better health at 40. I owe to me, my family, and those that are impacted by my business.
That is one of the biggest reasons this blog entry is late. I’ve been busy and focused. Sometimes you can do it all and other times you have to focus your energy. One thing is for sure, I’m focused on a better me which I hope results in a better dad, a healthier man, a more passionate husband, and a more impactful business owner. I want to be more consistent in writing on this blog, to provide you more fitness info, and to help reach others but it won’t be at the expense of losing myself.
Maybe your 2023 is just starting, maybe you started and are stuck, or maybe you are rocking it. It’s never too late and it’s never guaranteed so take a look around on where you’ve been, where you are, and where you are going to see if you need to recalibrate to make 2023 the year of ME.
-Coach B
